Uhhh... Don't even get me started on your whole "Freedom of speech is bad for democracy and religion" theme, but Canada is a country that respects religious freedom, a multicultural society that goes for accomaodation rather than assimilation into one big culture. Religious freedom includes allowing same-sex marriages for those who have no religious laws against them, and allowing those who believe solely in the traditional definition of marriage to refuse same-sex marriage and speak out against it. As a Canadian I found this part of your post ridiculous and insulting. As for the second half, it doesn't seem far off from the truth nowadays even; if people are going to do it, and they will, they should be shown how to do it so they are less likely to harm themselves.
P.S. Have you ever thought about a job with the Colbert Report? A lot of your stuff is pure gold!

I'm all for a free and democratic society, but when legislation begins to be passed that criminalizes free speech, then that is what I have a problem with.

I would looove to be on the Colbert Report. That guy is funny. And he's Catholic! (or so he claims he is ;~| )